Five

It's been five years today since this little girl arrived in our lives:

Each year it becomes more clear that Bridget's arrival (more to the point:  Bridget's Down syndrome diagnosis) brought fear and anxiety that was unwarranted.  Each year, it becomes more and more evident that we wasted time and energy feeling uncertain when we should have been celebrating.  

This little girl is so worth celebrating!

Bridget, you are everything I could ever have imagined, and more.  From every angle, and every vantage point, you are precious.  Your joy is contagious.  Your light is undeniable.  How lucky we are to love you!  Happy Birthday, my beautiful, sweet girl!

Alina - October

Alina is three and a half years old.  And though most people are shocked to hear it, Bridget is bigger than Alina, who looks much more "sturdy" than her older sister.  (Alina is 36 inches and 30 pounds.)   

She adores Bridget (who she now calls Bruh). She truly looks up to her.  It is too cute.  Whatever Bridget is doing, we will usually find Alina nearby doing the same thing or sitting and smiling while watching Bridget. 

She also "tells on" Bridget by pointing while saying Bruh! (look at Bridget!) to let me know that Bridget is getting into something or doing something she is not supposed to be doing.  As innocent as Bridget looks, this happens more often than you might think ;).

Alina loves to eat!  She's not picky.  At all.  She is game to try (and will finish) whatever we offer her.

Alina wants so much to talk, and is really trying.  She is making progress, though at this point we are hearing more sounds than clear words.  Her speech therapist at school is working on sound production while also offering her a variety of other creative methods to communicate (picture options as well as devices with switches and buttons that she can manipulate to show what she wants and what she understands).

Alina is downright dangerous with the t.v. remote. Every time she gets a hold of it, she's making something purposeful happen (and not just changing the channel or turning it off).  She's been caught trying to order Hot Tub Time Machine more than once, and recently, she somehow recorded 13 days worth of infomercials. 

Alina loves to tickle other people's feet (Emmy says it is one of Alina's talents...she really tickles).

Our two youngest girls are buddies...and complete opposites. 
The laughing that goes on at our house (and there's a lot of it) is a perfect example of the difference in our two little girls.  Bridget is a hee hee hee kind of a girl, while Alina is definitely the huh huh huh type.

While Bridget hugs, Alina waves.  She is the perpetual mayor, greeter and beauty queen, quick with a hearty Hi!, a wave and a smile.  

Bridget is a girly-girl.  Alina is a mixture, a tomboy-girl--she is rough and tumble, but loves (and I mean loves) playing dress-up.  No matter what she is wearing, she is also always in a tutu, or play shoes! 

And while Bridget is cautious, Alina is our risk taker (and has the bumps and bruises to prove it).  She approaches life, in general, with vigor.  She's quick to jump in and participate.  

To give a little more insight into our youngest daughter, here are some observations from her therapists at school:

"Alina has acquired her sister's love of giving orders!  We can't go more than 5 feet without her telling me to TOP!  (stop) :)"

"Alina is so friendly to the students we meet in and around the school!"

 "At snack today, Alina requested ah. puh. mo. (more apple) with prompting.  She signed it, too :)."

"Alina is doing super!  She seems to be getting into chairs safely--though she did try some acrobatics once in a chair :)."

Alina has added so much to our lives.  She's active and curious and adventurous, and she keeps us busy.  She also has a wonderful disposition and sweet spirit.

She is her own person...a beautiful and amazing person we are happy to know and love!

Bridget - October

Bridget is four now, and she is definitely the Big Sister :).  She's still pretty tiny (at 37 inches and 31 pounds), but is a mighty little thing.  

She's very socially aware and can name each student in her preschool class.  She's playing with other kids this year and seems to be enjoying her new friendships.

At home, Bridget wants to dictate what activities take place, who participates and how they will play.  She likes to rule help Alina.  She loves to pin her down and pretend to take her blood pressure take care of her with their pretend doctor's kit.  (Alina is a usually a good sport about it, but will also protest when she's really not happy with what is going on.)

Bridget loves and looks after her little sister.  She will pat Alina on the back gently if Alina is sad, and will let me know if Alina seems to be needing anything.  If she wants a particular doll or toy, she will first make sure Alina has a different, satisfactory one ;)--which accomplishes two things:  looking out for her sister and getting what she wants.  Pretty clever, that one.

Bridget is our resident Hugger. 

She greets people with hugs, says good-bye with hugs and gives hugs when people are sad or mad.  She'll often tilt her head to the side and ask in a sweet, little voice, "A hug?"  (Yes, please.  A hug from Bridget is usually just what the doctor ordered :).)

Each day, I give her a big hug right before she gets on the bus.  And each day, she climbs the steps, turns around and shouts (HUG!) with her arms outstretched.  (One More Hug should become a common practice.  What a great way to start the day!) 

Last year at this time, Bridget was talking very little.  She was signing quite a bit and saying one word at a time.  She is talking a lot more now!  She keeps us laughing with her expressions (My word, Oh Goodness!, Give it!) along with some of her other requests, like asking for a paper towel--rather than toilet paper--when she's done using the potty, or shouting, TISSUE! when Alina needs her nose wiped.  

Bridget has started adding an "ee" sound to the ends of words, just because she thinks its funny--"cup" becomes "cup-py", "sock" is "sock-y".  I have no idea why she started doing this, but it sounds hilarious coming out of her little mouth.

Oh, and she is no longer Jibby.  She's "Ji-jit", "Me, Ji-jit" or "Brrr...Ji-jit".

Right now her favorite things include:  riding the bus, taking care of baby dolls, laughing and having tea parties with Alina, dancing with her siblings and watching Little Bear.

She's matured so much in this past year.  I guess that's what happens when you become a Big Sister ;).

Checkmarks, Bubbles and Dots

...can never paint a full or accurate picture of a person.

While this type of questionnaire might provide some broad information, these dots do not represent my child.  They don't even begin to say what it is about her that makes her unique, special and talented in her own right. 

Whether or not my daughter can call her friends by name, can button her coat or knows at least two opposites, does not have any impact on who she is.

Two of my daughters have Down syndrome. They are not Down syndrome. 

They are amazing little girls who deserve to be seen as such.

My girls are not best described by a certain number of chromosomes, a list of health concerns, a score on a standardized test, or by the answers to questions on a fill-in-the-bubble developmental inventory.

Development charts and formal assessments provide limited information and perspective.  Yes, Bridget and Alina have Down syndrome, which includes developmental delays.

They both also have many skills and abilities.  They are loved and cherished and supported--and we see their huge potential. 

They deserve so much more than a label.  

They defy definition :).

*Tomorrow's post will be an update on Bridget.  Wednesday's will be all about Alina.

Flashback

There is a specific reason this story is posted today.  Check back tomorrow to learn the significance...

A Regular Baby (Bridget’s Arrival)

Written by big sister Sara on her 11th birthday (10.22.07)

Bridget looked just like a regular baby. She didn’t look any different than I thought she would. She was really beautiful and sweet, but I was worried about her health and what her life would be like. I was sad about all the things she might not be able to do. When I first saw her, I remember exploding into tears. I don’t know exactly why—I just did. I felt a mix of emotions. I was excited that she was born, but I was also a little disappointed. I was just hoping for a regular baby that we could take home in a couple of days.

I’m 11 and the oldest of five now that Bridget is here. I thought our family was big enough already with my two little brothers and one sister. When my mom told me she was pregnant with number five, I cried. I was happy—and surprised—and a little worried about the added responsibility of having another younger sibling. I had no idea how all of our lives would change the day she was born.

We were all supposed to wear pink t-shirts to the hospital to meet our new baby sister. But, she was almost six weeks early and the shirts we ordered had not arrived yet. My dad came to pick us up, and we had to hurry because Bridget needed surgery and was being moved to a different hospital. When we got there, I could tell my mom had been crying. She said Bridget would be fine, but that there was something other than the surgery that we needed to know about. “Bridget has Down syndrome,” she said quietly. We talked about what that meant as a family for only a few minutes before the nurses brought our new baby sister to see us.

As I looked at her, I felt sad that she couldn’t come home with us. I didn’t like seeing her in that plastic bed with all the tubes and wires attached to her. I wondered how long she would be in the hospital and what life would be like once she came home. I did not know what to expect.

After her surgery, I spent many hours at the hospital with Bridget. As I got to know her, I discovered that my baby sister was just a regular baby after all.

I realized that she was absolutely perfect. She was warm and soft and she smelled sweet. She even looked a lot like I did when I was a baby. I ached when I had to leave without her. I slept with clothes she had worn that we brought home to wash. I couldn’t wait to have her home with the rest of us.

We had all been so sad when Bridget was born needing surgery. And then there was the Down syndrome part. I didn’t know when we would be happy again, or if we would even be celebrating her birth. But, when she was finally able to leave the hospital--after a month-long stay--our whole family walked around her hospital floor like we were in a parade. My mom carried Bridget. We were all smiling and waving and proudly wearing our pink t-shirts. The nurses were clapping. It was a great celebration.

I know now that you can’t just hear an explanation of Down syndrome, or go on the computer and research it. The way to learn about Down Syndrome is to know someone with it.

Before Bridget was born, I never thought much about people with disabilities. I didn’t really pay attention. Now, when I see people with handicaps or disabilities, I pay more attention. I know they sometimes have to try harder to do the things most of us take for granted. I see people with disabilities as regular people who are just trying to learn and to enjoy life like everyone else--and I think of the families that love them.

To me, Bridget is the most beautiful baby in the world. She’s adorable and funny and she likes for me to hold her against my chest. I know she loves me because she smiles at me. I feel like we are going to be really close. I think Bridget was made especially for our family. She’s like a puzzle piece that fits perfectly and makes us complete. We didn’t know it, but we were waiting for her all along.

Oh My Goodness...

Look what we have here:



Two cute preschoolers!

My Name is...

Jibby!

That is what Bridget is calling herself...Jibby. Or Jibit. I can't even type it without giggling. (Jibby is Bridgey. Jibit is Bridget.)

Her speech is much better than we once thought it might be, and she can say lots of names clearly. Why, oh why, couldn't we have selected a name she would be able to pronounce ;)?

Notes from PT

Today, Bridget had her weekly physical therapy session at school. Her PT sends a note home each time she works with Bridget. In the note today: a list of the things they worked on together (jumping, going up and down curbs & stairs, tiptoes, running, standing on 1 leg, balance beam, kicking, playing catch). There was also a little note at the bottom of the page:

"Bridget becomes jealous when I work with other students which motivates her to impress me :)."

Bridget, jealous? Interesting. I wonder what she'll do when we bring a new little sister home from Eastern Europe in May...

Funny Girl, Part II

Bridget keeps us smiling. There are so many things I wanted to add to that last post--things that make life with Bridget interesting and fun. And none of them have much to do with the extra chromosome :). So here they are, some other things I love about life with her:

-She always notices if I hit a pot hole, speed bump or curb. Oopsie, she says quietly from the back seat. She also shouts Whoa! when we turn corners.

-She knows what she wants (and doesn't want) and is always thinking about how best to get her point across. At dinner one night recently, she was trying to get out of eating brussels sprouts. The conversation went: Bridget: Mommy, hot. Me: No, Bridget, they are not hot. Bridget: Mommy, Eewww.

-Bridget surprises people (us included). Whenever we go through a drive through, Bridget sits silently while I am ordering. She must be listening intently, because she waits until the order-taker gives the total, and then she shouts O-K!! BYE!! The people at the window are always laughing when we pull up.

-She is persistent and polite at the same time :). If she wants a cup, for example, everyone should be prepared to hear her requests for that cup over and over until said cup is retrieved. She almost always adds a very sweet Please to the request, but her eye is on the prize. Anyone who answers her calls for help is rewarded with a hearty "Que" (Thank You) or a Job! (Good Job).

-Bridget takes great care of her baby dolls and stuffed animals (and a 12-inch Spiderman action figure). She likes to get them comfy with pillows and blankets and books. She feeds them, rocks them, kisses them and takes them for walks. It is not uncommon to look in our family room and see a doll lovingly tucked into the doll pack & play, or to see Bridget come around the corner pushing Spiderman in the doll stroller.

What things do you love about life with your kids?

Bridget, Potty Trainer Extraordinaire

This is from an update I wrote on December 9:

We ditched the official potty training way back in the summer. Right after we started, it was clear to me that while Bridget was showing many readiness signs, she was not 100% ready to potty train (mainly because she was not able to give me any notice before she needed to go...so even though she was mostly going in the potty, I never felt safe taking her anywhere in underwear). Being able to go when I asked her to was great, but in my mind, that did not constitute being "potty trained". Sometimes, we'd sit in the bathroom for a half-an-hour before she would go. A few days of that was more than enough for both of us, so I decided she was getting ready to train, but was not quite there. And there was really no hurry, other than some arbitrary timeline I'd set to potty train her by the age of three. I decided I'd assess as we go, and begin again when she was able to tell us consistently when she needed to go (and after she'd adjusted to preschool). She has made strides in all areas this past few months. Now it is a matter of me getting serious about it again. When I am able to be consistent and focus on potty training for at least a week, we'll begin again. I am not in a rush, though. It will happen sometime soon :).

...Bridget is now completely "schedule" trained! She goes whenever we put her on the potty and often (but not always) tells us before she needs to go. (This is a modified system from what we have done with our older children, but it is working for us!)

She is extremely proud of herself, too. She shouts, Yea, PEE! Yea, POOP! Job!! (Good Job!)

I can't use the restroom myself without flushing and thinking, Yea, PEE :)!

I got a much needed push from a wonderful, wise woman (a developmental specialist) who sees Bridget each week on Fridays. Her name is Joanne, but Bridget calls her "JoJo"....and JoJo told mommy that Bridget should be wearing underwear :). She thought Bridget was fully capable and ready, which I also knew.

In her vast experience (she has been working with children with Down syndrome for over 30 years), she says most kids with Ds "schedule" train for 6 months to a year before they begin telling caregivers consistently when they need to go. She said not to let that be a deterrent in expecting Bridget to use the potty and that we could miss a window of opportunity. So we went for it!

With our older children, I firmly believed that pull-ups were only for bed once they started training (I didn't want to confuse them). But all parents know that the start of potty training can be deadly--particularly when you need to go somewhere. Accidents don't benefit anyone, I've always thought. I try to ensure best-odds potty training, always.

With Bridget, it just so happens that she stays completely dry if I put her on the potty first thing in the morning, when she gets home from morning preschool, before her nap, after her nap and once in the evening, before bed. I have been puting her in a pull-up for school, but the classroom aides have agreed to put her on the potty at school and she is coming home dry each day :). Such a big girl!

I had hedged on doing things differently than what we've always done with potty training. Now I am wondering why I didn't just go with the flow and do things how it was best for Bridget right from the start. My youngest daughter continues to teach me how to let go and embrace whatever is, beyond my own notion of the way things should be.

Today, I put Bridget down for her nap in a pull-up with underwear over it. I turned around to see her take them both off, shake the pull-up out of the underwear and put just the underwear back on. Seems she has some ideas of her own...

Hot Dogs for Breakfast

...That sounds like it should be a book title :).

This morning, Bridget climbed up in the chair next to Emmy. She was just waking up, and her hair was half-covering her sleepy little face. On auto pilot, I got a cup of yogurt out of the fridge and poured her some milk. I happily set the yogurt, a spoon, and the cup of milk in front of her. She usually claps. This morning, she did not move.

Aren't you hungry?, I asked.

She gently (but clearly) pushed the yogurt aside. She pointed to the fridge. Hot. Dog.

You want a hot dog? I asked.

In her sweetest little voice, she answered, Yes.

"Hot Dog" and "Yes" as clear as can be. She's saying "Yes" (not "Do" or "Yep") all the time now. Her emerging speech is so exciting.

So hot dogs for breakfast, it was, and yogurt for lunch!

Talk Talk

I've always wondered what role Down syndrome would play in Bridget's speech development. (Most children with Ds seem to have speech delays, and some are significant.)

When Bridget was an infant, she seemed to be right on track--she was babbling in many different sounds and experimenting with sounds, repeating sounds we made, etc.. She was even trying to mimic singing when she was four or five months old.

As she neared her first birthday, she did not seem to be close to saying words we could understand. And it was not for a lack of trying. She was watching our mouths closely when we talked, and she was very vocal, but not verbal.

We had been playing the Baby Bee Vocabulary Builder DVDs for her, which she was interested in watching, but which did not seem to be making a difference in her language development (acquisition, maybe, but not development).

She has always seemed like she understands most of what she hears. Bridget is very perceptive and aware. She makes connections and is able to let us know that she is following everything that is going on around her.

We started signing basic, everyday words with Bridget when she was about 10 months old. We always said and signed words together so we could encourage both ways of communicating and give her the choice to select whichever way worked best for her.

She picked up signs quickly, earlier than she could speak words that we could understand. With signs, she was able to tell us easily when she was thirsty, or tired, or mad. She told us when she wanted to take a bath, or wanted more of something. Having a way for her to communicate her needs not only helped reduce frustration (for both of us), but helped others understand just how much she was processing.

Fast forward to last summer, when Bridget was three and being evaluated for preschool placement. She was still signing, and was still vocal...but still not verbal. She had begun to say some basic words (and some were very clear). She was not, however, saying more than one word at a time for the most part. The sweet speech pathologist who evaluated Bridget thought she heard Bridget say, "where my mommy go?". While we make a point to never underestimate her, Chris and I were pretty sure Bridget did not utter that sentence.

When preschool began in the fall, Bridget had added a few more words to her spoken language repertoire, but not many. I tried to get her to say the names of her teachers, therapists and aides to no avail. She could not say her own name, either. That first week of preschool, she came home and we ate lunch together mostly in silence. I wanted to know what she did at school, whether she was happy there, and whether she'd learned anything new. But she could not tell me any of those things. I only got information if I emailed the teacher, and I didn't want to bug her every day. There were a few days that I felt a twinge of sadness about it, but that didn't last for long. Bridget seemed to be loving school, and I knew the teacher would let me know if there were any problems.

It has only been four short months since the beginning of school, and we are seeing some major progress in Bridget's speech (as well as in other areas of her development--but that is another post altogether).

I've heard other parents say that their children with Ds became much more verbal somewhere between their third and fourth birthdays, and this seems to hold true with Bridget.

She's attempting to say everything we ask her to repeat. (She also says, "SAY...cup" or "SAY...go sleep!") Last night in the bathtub, she said each of the letters of the alphabet, clearly. Today, while eating lunch, she announced, "Emmy at 'cool' (school)".

She is also answering questions appropriately, for example, the question, "Are you tired?" often gets a "NO GO SLEEP" response. Last weekend, the social worker who came for our home study asked Bridget, "Is there a show you like to watch on t.v.?" Bridget shouted, "MAX!" (Max & Ruby).

I love her new verbal skills...and her spunk. You go, Bridget.

Talk Talk

I've always wondered what role Down syndrome would play in Bridget's speech development. (Most children with Ds seem to have speech delays, and some are significant.)

When Bridget was an infant, she seemed to be right on track--she was babbling in many different sounds and experimenting with sounds, repeating sounds we made, etc.. She was even trying to mimic singing when she was four or five months old.

As she neared her first birthday, she did not seem to be close to saying words we could understand. And it was not for a lack of trying. She was watching our mouths closely when we talked, and she was very vocal, but not verbal.

We had been playing the Baby Bee Vocabulary Builder DVDs for her, which she was interested in watching, but which did not seem to be making a difference in her language development (acquisition, maybe, but not development).

She has always seemed like she understands most of what she hears. Bridget is very perceptive and aware. She makes connections and is able to let us know that she is following everything that is going on around her.

We started signing basic, everyday words with Bridget when she was about 10 months old. We always said and signed words together so we could encourage both ways of communicating and give her the choice to select whichever way worked best for her.

She picked up signs quickly, earlier than she could speak words that we could understand. With signs, she was able to tell us easily when she was thirsty, or tired, or mad. She told us when she wanted to take a bath, or wanted more of something. Having a way for her to communicate her needs not only helped reduce frustration (for both of us), but helped others understand just how much she was processing.

Fast forward to last summer, when Bridget was three and being evaluated for preschool placement. She was still signing, and was still vocal...but still not verbal. She had begun to say some basic words (and some were very clear). She was not, however, saying more than one word at a time for the most part. The sweet speech pathologist who evaluated Bridget thought she heard Bridget say, "where my mommy go?". While we make a point to never underestimate her, Chris and I were pretty sure Bridget did not utter that sentence.

When preschool began in the fall, Bridget had added a few more words to her spoken language repertoire, but not many. I tried to get her to say the names of her teachers, therapists and aides to no avail. She could not say her own name, either. That first week of preschool, she came home and we ate lunch together mostly in silence. I wanted to know what she did at school, whether she was happy there, and whether she'd learned anything new. But she could not tell me any of those things. I only got information if I emailed the teacher, and I didn't want to bug her every day. There were a few days that I felt a twinge of sadness about it, but that didn't last for long. Bridget seemed to be loving school, and I knew the teacher would let me know if there were any problems.

It has only been four short months since the beginning of school, and we are seeing some major progress in Bridget's speech (as well as in other areas of her development--but that is another post altogether).

I've heard other parents say that their children with Ds became much more verbal somewhere between their third and fourth birthdays, and this seems to hold true with Bridget.

She's attempting to say everything we ask her to repeat. (She also says, "SAY...cup" or "SAY...go sleep!") Last night in the bathtub, she said each of the letters of the alphabet, clearly. Today, while eating lunch, she announced, "Emmy at 'cool' (school)".

She is also answering questions appropriately, for example, the question, "Are you tired?" often gets a "NO GO SLEEP" response. Last weekend, the social worker who came for our home study asked Bridget, "Is there a show you like to watch on t.v.?" Bridget shouted, "MAX!" (Max & Ruby).

I love her new verbal skills...and her spunk. You go, Bridget.

New

My time is short these days, and I have been meaning (and wanting) to get here and write about all kinds of things. I have several posts half-done. Does that count :)? Anyway, here are a few things I've been wanting to mention:

- Notice the search bar at the top right under header. Yea! It works. Feel free to try it out :).

- Updates on Bridget:

Preschool is going great. We just got her first progress report, and she is, well, making progress! She has a nice start on many of the goals on her IEP, which I am pleased about, but I am even more happy about how much she is enjoying school (as well as the bus and even her backpack!) and about all the new things she is doing and learning.

We're noticing a "language explosion"--in relative terms, of course. Last night, Bridget said, "I go sleep" and "Where cup? Where my cup!" She has started saying, "Oopsie!" (which has morphed from her very cute "Oop!"), and is now able to say every name in our family (a few of the names are short versions, like "Bri" for Brian...but we know exactly what she is saying, and it is clear to others as well). She is saying "Mom-my" and "Dad-dy" and "Em-my" (when previously she was just saying "Dad", "Mom", and "Em"). She is also beginning to put new words together to describe things, like, "baby sad". Bridget is still signing, but consistently saying words with the sign. She's repeating lots of things they must be doing in school, such as letting us know the type of weather each day at the bus stop (she signs and says "cold" or "rainy" or "sunny"). She will also randomly mention names of her classmates. She is singing along with the ABC's, Itsy-Bitsy Spider, You Are My Sunshine, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Happy Birthday and other songs. She says "Hap-py Birth-day" and "Pat-a-cake" very clearly, as well as many other words in the songs. Some parts are less clear to us, but she is attempting the whole song regardless. Wow!

Bridget is very much enjoying all of her siblings (and vice versa). She is absolutely part of the group, just as any other three-year-old would be. She especially likes reading with Emmy, listening to iPods with any of the kids and being in the basement when the boys are shooting baskets (trying to shoot baskets herself).

We ditched the official potty training way back in the summer. Right after we started, it was clear to me that while Bridget was showing many readiness signs, she was not 100% ready to potty train (mainly because she was not able to give me any notice before she needed to go...so even though she was mostly going in the potty, I never felt safe taking her anywhere in underwear). Being able to go when I asked her to was great, but in my mind, that did not constitute being "potty trained". Sometimes, we'd sit in the bathroom for a half-an-hour before she would go. A few days of that was more than enough for both of us, so I decided she was getting ready to train, but was not quite there. And there was really no hurry, other than some arbitrary timeline I'd set to potty train her by the age of three. I decided I'd assess as we go, and begin again when she was able to tell us consistently when she needed to go (and after she'd adjusted to preschool). She has made strides in all areas this past few months. Now it is a matter of me getting serious about it again. When I am able to be consistent and focus on potty training for at least a week, we'll begin again. I am not in a rush, though. It will happen sometime soon :).

I have been thinking of others during this holiday season, and have been giving whenever and wherever I can. Brian's 5th grade class has been talking about Random Acts of Kindness and has been trying to focus on things to do that (1) cost little--or no--money and (2) are unexpected. We've been talking at dinner time about what each of the kids is doing each day to show that they are paying attention to others and how they are spreading love and kindness. We're participating in food drives, adopt-a-family programs and other community-oriented programs, as well as encouraging the kids to give compliments and go out of their way to notice others & opportunities to make someone smile.

(Does anyone remember hearing about the customer who paid for the next person's order in the Starbucks drive-through? There's an idea that could be applied to any drive-through scenario.)

I have been busy fundraising for our local Ds organization, helping friends to locate hard-to-find gifts, and sharing special recipes with family and friends. I'll always answer the call when someone is looking for a certain type of recipe (holiday, nut-free, vegetarian, etc.) if something I have fits the bill. I'll also do some asking around if need be. Giving of time, talents or ideas is free and easy.

I have loved reading all the thoughts and ideas about giving on other blogs. Check Bethany's blog to find everyone else who is participating in her challenge.

"Germ Warfare"

So all this week, Chris kept asking, Is Bridget coming down with something?

No, I explained, her preschool class is learning about germs...what they are, how they spread, and how to practice healthy habits.

It must have made a big impact on her, because she was sneezing and coughing (in a very contrived, exaggerated way) every other minute this past week. (With all the crud going around, we are all a little bit on edge when we hear coughing!).

Bridget has known how to cough into her elbow for about a year now. She loves to practice covering her sneezes and coughs.

She's such a little actress. And her big break came this week, when she was asked by her teacher to demonstrate the "covering your cough" technique to the class during circle time.

Yea, Bridget. You go girl.

I wish I had pictures of that!

More Than a Number

My daughter has Down syndrome. She is not Down syndrome.

I usually cringe a little (sometimes a lot) when I hear or read a professional assessment of Bridget (from doctors, therapists, service coordinators or educators), because Bridget cannot be described by a certain number of chromosomes, by a list of health concerns, by a score on a standardized test, or by the answers to questions on a fill-in-the-bubble developmental inventory.

She is an amazing little girl who deserves to be seen as such.

Wendy echoed this thought on Zip-Perdue-Dee-Dah the other day:

I think what bothered me was that here we are at the start of the next chapter and to the powers that be Kira is a pile of paperwork and "Down syndrome". And while I have no doubt that they will love my daughter, it's not because she has Down syndrome. She's my smart, beautiful, funny daughter not a bunch of test results and check marks on a development chart.

Before Bridget's evaluations to see if she would qualify to receive preschool services and therapy through our local schools, I worried about the very same things. I didn't want to overwhelm school district personnel with volumes of information about Bridget, but I wanted them to see more about her than the limited perspective formal evaluations would provide. I knew the evaluations would detail Bridget's delays and areas of need. I wanted the team to see her many skills and abilities, to see that she is loved and cherished and supported, and to understand her huge potential. I wanted them to see her as a person. So this is what I sent in with her paperwork...

A Snapshot of Bridget at Age 3

Bridget is a social, sweet little girl who loves to explore, pretend, and laugh. She’s alert, expressive, playful, secure and spirited. She takes turns, consoles, and interacts with others.

Bridget knows just what she wants and how to get it. She communicates through a combination of signs, spoken words, sounds, gestures and facial expressions.

She understands most of what she hears, and remembers most of what she learns. She likes routines, but is also usually willing to try new things.

She’s generally agreeable, but has ideas of her own that she will make known. Bridget is affectionate and pays close attention to what is going on around her. She’s physically strong, and strong-willed.

She’s showing an interest in—and emerging skills in—counting, letters, recognizing shapes, drawing, running, jumping, enjoying books, large motor play, and spoken language.

Bridget is capable of so much and full of potential.

We look forward to seeing her grow and enjoy school next year!

Mission Statement For Bridget's Preschool Services

We believe that Life is a gift, and that Bridget is a gift. We believe that all people are always in the process of becoming--and that all people seek to find meaning in Life. We value Bridget as a person and as a family member.

As her parents, our goal is to be educated and able to make informed decisions about Bridget's care and to be the very best advocates for her in all arenas. We will approach her learning with creativity and dedication. We will work willingly with teachers, therapists, administrators and other care providers to create and carry out an appropriate plan for Bridget’s growth and participation in the classroom.

We’d like to see cues-based instruction whenever possible, or encouraging Bridget to acquire skills as she shows readiness (instead of "teaching" her from a pre-existing plan based on standard development scales).

Bridget is reaching milestones on her own timeline, and has her own set of talents and limitations. We’d like to pay attention to her gifts while offering her opportunities to grow.

We believe strongly in Bridget--in her abilities and potential--and in her right to be treated with love and respect. We realize that she will benefit from specialized services and are committed to giving her every type of support and encouragement to be as happy, healthy and independent as she can be.

Overdue.

So yes, blogging has taken a backseat to everyday life. Here's what I've been doing:


...learning how to tie a tie! Okay, I really did have to use this photo tutorial to get Kyle's tie figured out while Chris was out of town, but I have been doing a few other things as well. Ahem.

How about a little update on Miss Bridget (with more to come soon...I promise)!

New things she's saying:

"Where cup? See it. (i.e., I don't see it.)"

"Hap-py Birth-day to Bridgey!"

"Cup, pwease."

"Map!" (which means...Max & Ruby, her new favorite show)

"Boy!" "Girl!"

"Hot!" "Cold!"

"I" "Me" "You"

"OKAY!"

"Moe Juice!" "Moe Nilk!" "Moe Cup!" "Mom! Cup!" This girl likes her drinks! And her cheese, but that is another story for another day :).

Overdue.

So yes, blogging has taken a backseat to everyday life. Here's what I've been doing:


...learning how to tie a tie! Okay, I really did have to use this photo tutorial to get Kyle's tie figured out while Chris was out of town, but I have been doing a few other things as well. Ahem.

How about a little update on Miss Bridget (with more to come soon...I promise)!

New things she's saying:

"Where cup? See it. (i.e., I don't see it.)"

"Hap-py Birth-day to Bridgey!"

"Cup, pwease."

"Map!" (which means...Max & Ruby, her new favorite show)

"Boy!" "Girl!"

"Hot!" "Cold!"

"I" "Me" "You"

"OKAY!"

"Moe Juice!" "Moe Nilk!" "Moe Cup!" "Mom! Cup!" This girl likes her drinks! And her cheese, but that is another story for another day :).

A Look Back: Starting Solids

Wow, these pictures bring back memories! I was nervous and excited to try solids with Bridget.

We gave her oatmeal cereal when she was about six months old. We then moved to apples and sweet potatoes within a few weeks. We used the small maroon spoons for her first year, and they were perfect.

Bridget did very well with stage one baby foods, cereal and yogurt (she had more trouble with crunchy and chewy textures--which I will cover in a future post--as she was not moving food from the sides of her mouth to "chew" with her gums...she had no teeth until she was 16 months old!).

I also cooked and pureed all kinds of squash, berries and other fruits and veggies as well as a wide variety of soups. We started giving her yogurt when she was about eight months old--Stoneyfield Farm O'Soy because I thought she might have a milk intolerance. (She still drinks soy milk today, although I have switched her over to regular, organic yogurt.)

Bridget has always eaten a wide variety of healthy foods. She has a great appetite and has never been picky about temperature or flavor, although she prefers seasoned or spicy foods. She has always done fine with different textures as well, although she did not like finding chunks of peaches in her yogurt and would growl when she got one :).

We moved from pureed baby foods to soft diced foods like banana and avocado, which she was able to finger-feed herself by the time she was about a year old.

Although we've had to take some extra steps to provide Bridget with a safe and nutritious diet, Bridget is absolutely worth it. I am happy to answer specific questions, so fire away if you have any!

Learning to Eat, Continued

In the months just after Bridget was born--when she still needed her milk to be thickened--I was able to express my milk and then safely let her "practice" nursing. We did this every day, at least once. She was almost always willing to try, and apparently got just enough hindmilk to keep her interested. Anyone who has been through continual pumping knows how much work it takes. It is truly a labor or love. Then again, so is attempting breastfeeding after months and months of bottle feeding (especially when you've been told your baby most likely will not be able to nurse effectively). I had a strong feeling that Bridget would be able to get the hang of it, though I couldn't imagine what it would be like to actually get to nurse her.

Once she was cleared for thin liquids, I began to transition her to breastfeeding by nursing once a day to start. Within a few days, she was nursing for all but her morning feeding (when she was the least sleepy and most hungry!). After about a week, she was nursing every feeding. It took some getting used to for both of us. Positioning was key, as were listening for her swallows and taking her off during let-down. After about a week, we were "working" less and feeding time became truly enjoyable. Within two weeks, there were no issues at all and she was nursing like a pro.

From my journal of Bridget's first year:

Life just got so much easier!

I can't believe Bridget is nursing! I was trying not to get my hopes up in case it didn't work out, but I have been waiting for this day since she arrived. I am overcome with emotion every single time I feed her.

Today the light was streaming through the window into our bedroom as I was feeding her, looking at her beautiful, sweet face and holding her little hand. (Bridget always holds my hand or shirt when she's eating). She is my chubby, gentle, sweet angel. Sometimes I can't believe she is ours. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world than where I am right now.

I took the last picture in yesterday's post the same day I wrote this entry. I wanted to always remember the sweetness and joy of that moment. It still makes me teary-eyed.

More on starting solids tomorrow...