tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576310937763715660.post3073093644730793031..comments2023-09-05T05:16:26.203-04:00Comments on Living in the Light: Coming to Terms, Martha Beck, & the "R" wordLisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17347490959410472081noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576310937763715660.post-8600735268748498872009-02-14T13:06:00.000-05:002009-02-14T13:06:00.000-05:00I work in mental health and the R word is a clinic...I work in mental health and the R word is a clinical term with a very specific meaning to describe only a symptom. However, I am very sensitized to it now and even if used clinically it is jarring. The pejorative use is due to the negative judgement attached to delays and differences in cognition. More is not necessarily better in many situations and this is one of them! I prefer cognitive and developmental delays and learning disabilities since those terms are more accurate and less judgemental. We all have to find our own way to navigate thru the prejudices and negativity but the one thing we do know is--- our children are special, in a good way!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576310937763715660.post-32237614573715294032009-02-13T17:36:00.000-05:002009-02-13T17:36:00.000-05:00You and I both agreed that it is what it is - and ...You and I both agreed that it is what it is - and that is just the deal. We are playing it. I grew up in a home where that word was never used as an insult. My parents simply didn't use it and would have popped us one if we had. <BR/><BR/>Having said that I have started to "take it back" if you will. When I speak to groups who want to hear our story, at the end I hold up a picture of Larkin or I hold her up if she is with me. I say to the crowd. My daughter has mental retardation. She is retarded by medical definition. If you use that word THIS is the little person you hurt. THIS is the victim of your hate speech. It's an ugly word when parents hear it used in an insulting manner and if I have to get down to ugly to make you appreciate just how hurtful it is - then by all means here I am. Don't use the word. <BR/><BR/>That is how I end most every speaking engagement. :) It's effective my friend.Larkinsmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03776957229785320327noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576310937763715660.post-32915636628257928532009-02-13T16:31:00.000-05:002009-02-13T16:31:00.000-05:00I read the book when I was pregnant with Lila and ...I read the book when I was pregnant with Lila and loved it. I appreciated the honesty. I am so acutely aware of Lila's delays. I guess I'm weird but instead of making me sad, most of the time it just makes me so acutely aware of her accomplishments! Every time she learns something new or begins to understand a new concept it is a victory. And boy do we celebrate. She makes my heart happy. It saddens me that some people will never give her a chance based on her diagnosis. In my heart I truly believe it is their loss. It also makes me sad that people feel sorry for me because Lila has DS. They will never be able to understand that she is an angel, our gift from God. She has softened my heart and changed my life. Sorry to go on and on....Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04425142535225258570noreply@blogger.com